Finding Love By Feeling Alone

Only within the full magnitude of loneliness does true love begin to take root.

Grasping for an “other” instead of delving within the dark chasm of our loneliness only leads us further from the love we all seek. Love is the knowing and the feeling of unity. That we are one, and that our enemies mirror our most innocent aspects. Those pieces of ourselves that were banished from our parent’s kingdom so long ago. Held hostage by our inner judge and critic – our most vulnerable and human tendencies suffer in misery. Tortured forever by our disapproval. Yet brought forever before us by those we most want to ignore. Those who bring us pain and discomfort. They bring to us our abandoned orphans. Aspects of ourselves that we resist, deny and desperately hide. But we can’t deny that there are homeless drug addicts living in our streets. Nor can we deny that the world is wretched with violence and misery. All of these outward appearances mirror aspects of our inner selves.

As Gandi said; “Be the change you want to see in the world”. If you want to change, you must be crazy. To create conscious change within yourself is almost impossible. You have better chances of becoming the next president of your country. Your suffering has to be great enough that you cannot continue to live with yourself the way you are. And no escapism relieves you any longer. Your pain becomes immune to your own addictions. When this happens and you finally surrender to the loneliness that rests deep in your heart, then change begins to happen on it’s own.

Only when you surrender to the intense discomfort of your sense of loneliness, completely, without distracting or running from that feeling, will love begin to take root. And slowly fill your being. Slowly and surely will it burn your pain away.

But most likely you will just suffer and sit in loneliness for years and years. And if you’re like most humans, you’ll die in intense pain and loneliness, regretting that you wasted your life on such petty and trivial things. The more you run from your pain now, the more it will bite you in the ass later.

– Blaise

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